The Foundation

One of my favorite Seinfeld episodes is when George has to meet with the “Foundation”. His fiancee has died from licking cheap wedding invitations with poison glue. Her parents have started a foundation in her honor. George is a weasel and is actually relieved to have gotten out of the wedding. He is less than enthusiastic about the Foundation.

[George is staring intently at a painting of Susan as Wyck walks in.]

Wyck: George.

[George doesn’t respond.]

Wyck: George. (taps him on the shoulder)

George: (startled) Oh!

Wyck: I’m Wyck Thayer, chairman of the Susan Ross Foundation.

George: Wink.

Wyck: (correcting him) Wyck.

George: Wyck.

Wyck: Now, as you know, the Rosses had considerable monies.

George: Oh. I know they have some monies.

Wyck: They had more than some monies. Many, many monies. And they planned to give a sizable portion of their estate to you and Susan after the wedding.

George: So, if Susan and I had… I mean, if the envelopes hadn’t, uh… then we–

Wyck: Yes.

George: And now?

Wyck: Not. It’s all been endowed to the foundation, even this townhouse.

George: This townhouse?

Wyck: This would have been your wedding gift.

George: And now?

Wyck: Not.

George: Not.

Wyck: Also endowed. George… I know how much Susan meant to you. It can’t be easy.

George: You know, it really can’t.

This is a Medicare primer that will be of no benefit to anyone.

When we retired from MUSD the district paid a flat fee for our Blue Cross until we were 65. Originally it was to be 80% of the cost. Of course, the cost skyrocketed and we were paying almost $10K a year at one time to keep our coverage. This was because the Central Valley Trust removed retired teachers from the general pool of working teachers in the plan. Apparently, it was unfair to make young teachers pay for the costs of retired teachers. I thought it was unfair that I had paid for retired teachers for 35 years and then was kicked out of the pool when I retired but I digress. When you turn 65 you get Medicare Part A. Medicare is funded by the federal budget and we all know how that is going. Medicare pays for 80% of your medical bills. That sounds good, but a $120K bypass can set you back $24K and that would be a cheap bypass done by a monkey in a dirty lab.

It dawns on you, and it does everyone, that you really need insurance to pay for what the Medicare Insurance does not pay. Those of you who have helped parents or are Old Goats know this insurance is cleverly named Medicare Part B. You buy insurance Part B to supplement Medicare Part A. We did this through AARP which stands for American Association of Retired Persons. To be a part of AARP you don’t need to be retired. I don’t think you even need to be old, because you can become a member at 50.

So, as a review, we now have the bankrupt Medicare Plan A and the AARP Part B for which we pay less than what we were paying to keep our District insurance.

Ahhh, but we are not done. Plan A and Plan B do not cover prescription drugs. Doh! I don’t take any drugs, prescription or otherwise. I would have thought I would not need Part D, but, no, if I don’t enroll now and need drugs three years from now, they ding me forever. Like Social Security, State Teachers Retirement and Public Employees Retirement System, Part D is a pyramid scheme. You pay when you don’t need it so it will be there (maybe) when you do need it. So, I needed to sign up for Part D. (And some of you thought it would be Part C. No, silly… D for Drugs. Part Cs are enhanced Part Bs that also take care of drugs.) I called the druggist in Colfax and asked about Humana Walmart… the cheapest and he said they bill them all the time… no need to drive down the hill to Wally World in case I need something for a sore throat.

I now have Medicare Part A, Part B and Part D. A and B started December 1. No matter how I signed up, Part D starts January first, 2012. Luckily I don’t need any drugs… so far.

Wyck: It can’t be easy.
George: You know, it really can’t.